[“Brittle Rille” by Kevin MacLeod begins]
Hello, and welcome to Daddybuck’s Notebook. I’m Lindsay, and my grandfather, who we called Daddybuck, was a creative genius. In this podcast, my goal is to find the beautiful things he made and share them with the world, and with you. I’m also going to be sharing my own works with you, paying it forward from the inspiration he gave me. So let’s get started!
[music ends]
I had trouble selecting a piece this month. It was a busy month anyway. I got to go to the first annual PodTales, a Podcast Festival in Boston, MA. I got to see the lovely people behind these amazing podcasts I love. I also got a hug from the lovely Sarah Werner of the Girl In Space and Write Now podcasts. She once hosted a free online session with some of her listeners, which I attended on my lunch breaks for several days in a row. That session helped me start this podcast. I got to thank her for that!
Anyway. PodTales is over, and now I need to deal with the fact that this episode is definitely late! I think the idea of being around all these podcasters I admire, whose work I listen to and love, intimidated me, and I stayed away from all this. I shouldn’t have, but I’m human, I’m learning, and I’m getting back on that horse. A couple days late won’t kill anyone.
I was going to choose another funny poem, but I couldn’t figure out what I wanted to do with it. A friend of mine, Jillian, suggested I read it and write a short personal essay about it, so I started thinking along those lines, but it still wasn’t coming together…
And then I found it. The Other Notebook.
I’ve been reading poetry from Daddybuck’s white notebook, a white binder with writing from the 1980s and then from the early 2000s. I love that notebook because it holds whimsical poetry I’d never seen before, or some I had but had forgotten about.
But Daddybuck has another notebook. It’s a black binder, not white, and it has a title written across the front: “MEDITATIONS, year 1984”.
Turns out my grandfather and I had even more in common than I thought. I knew he approached faith with an eye for the stars and a heart for awe-inspiring nature. In here, he talked directly to God about these things, but it’s more than that. He writes notes from Bible studies, which apparently he sometimes led. He asked Jesus questions about the confusing things he heard in church and challenged assumptions people made.
I found the piece I want to read on the second page. Like my friend suggested, I’m doing a personal essay – but this one’s written by Daddybuck. I’ll let him tell you where he’s at in 1984 in his own words:
[“Pride” by Kevin MacLeod begins]
Lord;
Well, here I am, breathing your air, standing on your world, watching your birds fly through the trees, and wondering why you made flies and ants. But if I think about it, you created the whole ecology, didn’t you? Thank you for ecology, biology, theology, zoology, and cosmology. Thank you for Carl Sagan to illustrate it for us and show us your mighty works, and skillfully never mention your name. How do you react to this, Lord? Does it hurt your feelings to watch such a beautiful and compelling film on the structure of the solar systems in the universe and never hear your name mentioned?
Lord, you say to glorify you. It might make some people angry to see you ignored, but it makes me feel great – right down to those visceral tingles when you realize you are watching the very words of God – it makes me feel great to see such a film.
It isn’t such an insult to have your name ignored after all, when the maker of the film can’t explain the maker of the universe. The works of Your hand stand by themselves, don’t they? The beauty of the curve of a butterfly’s wing and the subtle spacey blue of the stratosphere and the foundations of fire from a volcano – all these, and as Sagan says, billions and billions more – all speak your name. The granite walls of mountains and the round, white pebbles in a mountain stream speak of your creative power. Are these stones crying out when we don’t give you the praise?
When evolution is taught on my TV I want to shoot the screen out, as Elvis did, but then I get more satisfaction out of their final wrap-up which goes like this: “we are not sure how it all began, but you can accept on faith that its was purely accidental.” These people are building faith, Lord, but faith in accidents. Men make accidents, Lord, but you make creation.
Thank you, Lord, for applying the mighty energies of the universe to make things move the way You want them to move, and for causing that tiny little virus in my throat to have no power at all so I wouldn’t catch a cold the night I had to teach the lesson.
Lord, I stumble a lot, but you always catch me. Help me not to miss a single one of your creations, so I can praise you for them all.
[music ends]
I can relate to the way he wrote that. I used to write so many letters to God, wondering, regretting, committing myself to better faith. I’m excited, and a little wary, but mostly excited, to know how he dealt with this stuff.
For my contribution, I looked for some writing from one of my old notebooks. I’m reading something like his diary on here, so it’s only fair that I read a bit of my own, right?
Here’s a poem I wrote years ago on a hike in the mountains. At the top of the page, it’s titled “View from the Mountain”. I think I scratched out… “Pondering Infinity.” I guess I thought that was overkill!
So, “View from the Mountain”.
[“Lindsay’s Theme” begins]
My eye is drawn to the
Undulating horizon,
Mountains layer the edge of the world
As if it truly does not end
White-and-black birds glitter in the distance
Sun glinting off flapping wings
The trees have shed their camouflage
And stand bare and reaching
(as man would if he were honest)
To sky and heavens and life beyond
Branching out for lack of
Exact direction,
Yet always toward their source of Light
Feathered weathered branches –
I know you well.
[music ends]
*embarrassed laugh* Whew… I am so pretentious! And my Daddybuck is so full of surprises. Maybe we all are. Maybe it just takes other people to figure it out.
[“Lindsay’s Theme” begins]
The music in today’s episode is “Brittle Rille” and “Pride”, both by Kevin MacLeod at incompetech.com, and “Lindsay’s Theme” by cellist Mark Holt at cellokeys.wordpress.com.
The untitled meditation was written by John S Townsend, copyright date 1984, all rights reserved.
He also wrote the following poem, “Creativity”:
If you could create
New word or new shape
Put your mind in a box
And watch it escape
Thanks for listening, and, stay creative.
[music ends]
Thanks for listening, and, stay creative.
Lindsay, Written Down 